I have no car, one single friend remains in the area (but actually two towns over) and to get anywhere worthwhile you have to drive twenty minutes. But to get anywhere out of staters would consider worthwhile you would have to drive two hours.
The only movie theater is twenty minutes away and it has three theaters. And they are the kind of theater that keeps G-Force in for a month straight but There Will Be Blood was not even played there. I remember the first time I went to a movie theater in Massachusetts and was blown away by the sixteen theaters it housed, and it had an arcade. Well, we have Buck Hunter...
We do have a bowling alley, again twenty minutes away. If you want to drive 35 minutes in the summer, a camp ground has mini golf. As much as I love going to bars and dancing, I will not step foot in our local "night club." And as long as I stay here I will stay completely single.
So all of this makes me wonder why on earth I am wanting to stay for three extra months. I guess something this morning felt comfortable when I made the decision and later brought it up to my parents. Yes I am turning 23 tomorrow, no I do not want to move out of your house. Thanks.
More than being surprised by my decision, I was surprised by my mother's reaction. "Oh, I'm so glad! I think that's a great idea. No use running off so soon." I know my mom loves me and everything. But I also know she cannot stand having me in the house.
Yet, looking back, I have been a good house guest. Despite one or two crabby mornings, I haven't been that tough to live with. I haven't complained about my lack of friends or vehicle. I only yelled at my dad once, but there were no tears. Things have been peaceful (well, on my side, my 15 year old sister has had her share of discord).
I'm not sure if I'm growing up, or giving up. Either way I am starting to appreciate the beauty of white, glittering snow on endless hills. I am actually enjoying my job too... which may have to do with my dad telling me how great I'm doing, it always feels good to be appreciated! But I really am doing great, I haven't messed up once, the guests love me, I've been making sales. I am actually good at what I do.
I guess you would have had to have seen the prequel to this movie to understand my complete lack of self confidence. But it's easy to get... Lost in the shadows of amazing brothers, and especially darkened by my brilliant and successful younger brother, I have never found my own. I always thought the only thing I was good at was being a babysitter, and I even stopped being good at that... but only because I got sick of babysitting, I'm actually still really good when I want to do it (only my niece really..).
But as soon as I stepped back behind the desk I felt comfortable, and happy, and it showed. So maybe that is why I want to stay home. I am good at what I am doing now, if I leave I'll have to start all over again, at something I'm maybe not so good at. And I'll be taking classes, and trying to get comfortable in a new home. And right now, that is too much for me to handle. I just need to relax for a time. There's nothing wrong with that, right?